A New Place

Recommended Listening: Up On the Roof—the newest live recording from Carol King and James Taylor

            A few weeks ago I had my wisdom teeth pulled, and, as the moment arrived and my blood pressure skyrocketed, I tried to go to my peaceful place.  I closed my eyes and began to picture Tuscany, its soft rolling hills and glorious vineyards, its smell of fresh air and the luxury of a perpetually opened window.  Instead however, I saw a small purple face locked in a scream and little arms waving erratically in the air.   Before you start thinking Sigourney Weaver and space, I too was shocked to learn that this scene took place in our very own atmosphere.  My peaceful place had become, in short, the day my son was born.

            I think that we all have places we retreat to when the world becomes too much.  At night sometimes, when I cannot banish the anxieties of the day, I remember sitting by an open window and the feel of my old red patchwork quilt beneath my legs.  I can still hear that magic sound of the needle dropping onto my favorite record player.  I can taste my mom’s tuna fish salad and the feel of my pruned hands on long summer pool days. 

            And now there are more days to add to my bucket.  There is my wedding day, and the birth of my son, though not all my memories are so grand.  Most of them are homely like my patchwork quilt, and understand me like my favorite pair of slippers. 

            Now, when I am thinking back to those summer nights with my parents, a blanket of stars gathered above us, I can also add the first time Bro pointed out his window and saw his first star.  I can remember the time my dog Daisy and I descended upon the park after a massive snowstorm.  I can almost touch the spring crocus I now plant every year, and who never fail me. 

            Today I was watching Bro sitting in Zingermans and the pride on his face as he sat in his own chair with his own plate of food.  I wondered if this might become a peaceful place for him one day, and knew it had already become one for me.